Friday, January 9, 2009

ON SECOND THOUGHT...........

I was just thinking about fashion moving forward and I couldn't get past the need to remove the following articles of clothing/accessories from women's closets:

1) Ridiculously high, bulky platform shoes - these have been around for 3 1/2 years already. Let's move on y'all.......I am feeling low heeled (2") strappy shoes, strong heeled suede pumps (think early 90's Calvin Klein) and flat and high heeled tall boots in suede.

2) Sunglasses - I know these are a staple, but I like to look people in the eyes. I find that people use sunglasses as a stamp for stylishness, meaning, throw on anything and top it all off with a big, bug eyed pair of glasses and they make everything alright. Sunglasses are the accessory of choice of poseurs.

3) Skinny jeans - The problem is that most girls wear skinny jeans with a too tight top or a shrunken bomber jacket - this is all wrong. You have to have a play on proportion (a boyfriend jacket, a slouchy sweater, etc), unless you are Raquel Zimmerman. Plus, most people who wear skinny jeans are not doing themselves justice. A frowzy shape in a skinny jean is not cute. Let's ease it up a bit with flares, bell bottoms, trousers, boyfriend pants.....

4) Bad makeup - I see too many of my chocolate sisters wearing eye makeup that they copy from music videos. I particularly hate white shadow just above the lash or just beneath the brow. WHO IN THE HELL TOLD THEM TO DO THIS. STOP IMMEDIATELY!!!!! I am also sick of over contoured noses, overly thin brows and visible lip liner. I wish people realized that makeup is supposed to generally look natural and not like a mask.

5) Bad weaves and extensions - I think there is a trend of hair that is supposed to look like wigs or weaves. No longer do people try to make it look natural. No longer do people want you to ask "Is that her hair?". No longer is a real skin part necessary. Hollywood actresses all have that same 'center parted, softly waved around the face, with tumbling cascades of extra long hair' weave that is so annoying. Ride the train any day and you'll see hair that looks like hats. In urban areas, black women have become so dependent on fake hair that wearing natural hair is passe'. I see little girls, aged 5 or 6, with weaves and I just want to slap the hell out of the stupid mammy! Doesn't she realize that she is teaching the child that her hair, her natural beauty is not good enough? They start them at that age and then they are hooked. It damages their hair, their scalp and their esteem. I have seen time and time again how the natural beauty of a girl bursts out when she cuts her hair off, removes her wig or de-weaves herself. Think Roshumba - early 90's - sheer simplicity, sheer perfection.

6) High waisted jeans - This was a trend that worked on .01% of the population. They are highly unflattering and should be destroyed.

7) Knee High sneakers and Gladiator type boots - Generally worn with skinny jeans, need I say more?

3 comments:

MB said...

YES! YES! YES! I THINK I'LL CUT AND PASTE #5, MAKE 8X10 COPIES, DO A MASS MAILING AND START POSTING THEM ALL OVER TOWN, INCLUDING THE SUBWAY!!!

fashart said...

I LOVE THIS POST!!! I AGREE!! (except for the sunglasses part! Sometimes you only want you own "Peoples" all up in your eyes n' stuff" ) The hair post you should RE-POST...... DAILY..... HOURLY!!!!!

Charles' Chic Chat said...

Oh Aaron!!! Once again, my dear, you are dead on. Killing them not-so-softly with your mirror-accurate truth!